Stupid Republican tricks make a comeback

One might have expected, given dwindling interest in joining the party associated with the Hedgemony and all of its colossal screwups over the last eight years, that the Republicans would be saying and doing as little as possible this election season that would remind voters of their existence. One might also have expected, given that their president has sunk to a new all-time low in the approval polls, that they would be doing whatever they could to play down any connection with the man or his policies.

But one would be wrong to do so. It appears that there are no depths of either degradation or irrelevancy which the Republicans will not plumb, nor heights of hypocrisy or flights of irrelevancy that they will not aspire to.

I refer, of course, to the latest displays of lame-duck petulancy put on by congressional Republicans as the Democrats begin the consideration of the defense appropriations bill. Given that the Republicans are wont to wax effusive in their praise of, and pathetically eager to demonstrate their support for, our troops, one would have thought they'd be falling all over themselves to get this bill passed. They're not happy, though, that while the Democrats are giving them the money their president asked for to continue his pointless war in Iraq and Afghanistan, they're also attaching strings to that money, in the form of requirements to begin withdrawing our forces from Iraq and Afghanistan next year, and also increased allocations for benefits under the G.I. Bill for our returning veterans. And since this may well be the only appropriations bill that gets passed while the Boy Who Won't Be King Much Longer is still in office, it's also been loaded up with other items that are high on the Democrats' priority list, such as increased unemployment benefits.

But Republicans have been dragging their feet, instead. As reported on Morning Edition this morning, the Republicans in the House of Representatives called no fewer than 28 roll call votes yesterday, in an effort to forestall consideration of the bill to continue funding for the war--including two (nos. 274 and 275) on the supremely important question of "Celebrating the role of mothers in the United States and supporting the goals and ideals of Mothers Day." Their reason? They're upset at being excluded from the process of drawing up the bill.

Oh, cry me a fucking river, boys and girls. In case you've forgotten, you were the ones who wrote the rules under which the Democrats are now operating--and you used them in exactly the same way when you were in the majority. When we bitched about being shut out of the legislative process, you told us we should just suck it up and accept the fact that we were in the minority. I realize you thought you were going to hold on to the majority forever when you wrote those rules, but I can't be blamed for your inability to function well in the reality-based community. Now it's your turn to suck it up and adapt to being in the minority.

Personally, I hope that the DCCC and the DNC feature the Republicans' procedural foot-dragging very prominently in their advertising for the rest of this election cycle. It's an effective counter to the other side's perennial attempt to paint themselves as the champions of our troops, while we Democrats want to send them into harm's way without adequate preparation. Given that the Republicans have never once managed to back up their pious platitudes about supporting the troops with actual cold, hard cash, it's long past the time we reclaimed that meme from them.

Another stupid Republican trick that I hope will be featured prominently in election advertising this season is the invitation of the White House to all the congressional Republicans to come to the other end of Pennsylvania Avenue for a confab with the Boy Who Won't Be King Much Longer. The smarter ones among the Republicans in Congress have been quietly distancing themselves from Bush, since he's far more likely to act like an anchor than as a buoy on their aspirations for another term in office. We should make sure to get a photographer credentialed for the event--and use the footage thus gained of all those congressional Republicans making nice with the preznit each and every time they try to paint themselves as independent of him or as opposing his policies. The credo of the modern Republican Party seems to be "Thou shalt not disagree with another Republican, no matter what." John McSame likes to paint himself as a maverick, but he's been plus royaliste que le roi ever since the 2000 South Carolina primary. Nor is he the only one who has talked a good game, from time to time, about standing against their president, only to turn around and kiss his arse whenever it was presented to them. About time they had to pay a price for that aberrant behavior.